Zines!

image borrowed from http://agoodideaonpaper.blogspot.com

"A zine—an abbreviation of the word fanzine, and originating from the word magazine[1][2]—is most commonly a small circulation, non-commercial publication of original or appropriated texts and images. More broadly, the term encompasses any self-published work of minority interest.
A popular definition includes that circulation must be 5,000 or less and the intention of the publication is not primarily to raise a profit."

Whenever I try to talk about zines to people, they either have no idea what I'm talking about or they're all about them. I was living in Boston when I found my first one by accident one fateful valentines day. I was looking through the magazine shelf when I came across a tiny handmade booklet with long typed out pages. Typed like typewriter not computer. The cover had been watercolored and the drawings were so simple..it was love at first sight. I wrote to that girl, the author of that first zine and she sent me back a letter. We talked about our travels and other simple things. A couple days later I found another zine by Cindy Crabb, it was called Doris:

For years I moved across the country, and everywhere I ended up I would find another little Doris zine, always by accident. I was living in a house in Anaheim with a bunch of activist kids and one of them brought home a bunch of photocopied booklets to staple and distribute. One of them was the Doris anti-depression guide..I read that zine so many times that it was wrinkled and food splattered and falling apart.
I guess I like the idea of zines in general. A small way to be opininated, a way to be an activist and a way to get the word out about anything and have people respond in other small ways. Word of mouth, or a response zine or letters or meetings - so many ways! I like that they are so small because i like to carry them around in my back pocket or have them with me anytime i'm on a bus or have time to spare in general. I like that I learn something from every single one I read and I like that the community is small enough that when someone inspires me, I can tell them so and actually form a relationship with that person.
5 years after I read that first Doris zine, I was walking down the street in my new town when I came across a Good Vibrations the women focused worker owned activist sex shop. I had read about the store in the Doris anti-depression guide years before and now here was the shop right in front of me! A year and a half later I started working at Good Vibrations and I've contacted Cindy who is now writing a zine my store! It's so exciting, the way things and people can come together through this tiny little medium. I've met so many amazing women through zines and felt a feeling of community which is amazing to me.

Curves.

I just emailed Levi's because it was nearly IMPOSSIBLE to find a size 14. A size 14! I am sick and tired of feeling like I am not supposed to be curvy. Like it's not how women are supposed to be shaped. When I look in "normal" sized stores I find that everything is too small, and when I shop in the "plus" sized stores, everything is wayyy too big. So where do I belong? I have hips because I'm supposed to and all I've been able to find in any store i've gone into is a size 0-6. I was lucky to stumble over 1 pair of size 14 shorts yesterday at Old Navy. It was the last pair they had...sooooo you would THINK they got the clue. Girls are not size 0's which is why there are 190489105205 pairs left over and no size 14's or god forbid, anything OVER a size 14 left in the store. It's because this is the only thing we can fit our hips into. Apparently evolution got it wrong..we are obviously supposed to be shaped like sticks..and these hips? A mistake thanks to nature. Riiiiiight. So what did I do? I wrote them a goddamn letter.

"I went into your San Francisco store today and was disgusted that the only sizes that were on display were 0 and 1. Me being a size 14 was of couse disgruntled that it was difficult to find ANYTHING in my size. A girl next to me was having the same problem and she was a size 6-8...what is the problem here? You are producing sizes for women that are maybe 1 in 100! A size 0 and 1! That's all they had! This was for multiple styles and it was absolutely ridiculous! Women are not sticks, we have CURVES and this does not mean we should only have to wear tapered jeans. Please come to your senses and realize that we are not models. We eat and that's OKAY. By displaying these disgustingly small sizes you are encouraging eating disorders and giving women the wrong body image. Get your act together! Just because I wear a size 14 means I have to pay $58 dollars vs. the $29.99 for the small sizes?! Are you kidding me? Also, having your sales people say "ohhh...they don't make these over a 12" The fact that I have curves means I am not allowed to wear pants?"


I've gone down a pants size since I started losing weight. I have this idea in my head, that even if I do lose more weight I DO NOT want my curves to go away!!! NO!!!!! I love them!! I love the way curvy girls look, and I am being 100% sincere when I say this. It just looks so..hot! It really does, to me anyway. Not to say there is anything wrong with girls who don't have curves, I think all women are awesome, it's just that curves are my fortay but how did they become so unwanted in the eye of fashion? How did a size 8 become "plus" sized? And how did we get people like Tyra Banks telling us what a body should look like? A woman who was so pissed off that people considered her to be fat at a size 6. So mad that she televised herself going crazy screaming that she is not fat! Welcome to our world. So what does she do? She adds a "plus sized" model to her show America's Next Top Model..sort of ironic if you think about it. The plus sized girl was a size 6. And at a size 14 I am obese. I am so big that I am not allowed to wear pants in the eyes of clothing stores. Unless I go into a plus sized store in which case nothing fits me because I am not plus sized. I have a small waist and bigger hips. Where does this leave me?

"This weekend I became convinced that there is a similar island called 'The Island of the Girls with Hips,'and it is only a matter of time before I’m taken in the night and forced to spend my life there. And I’ll have no hope for a happy ending. I have hips. I want that clear and up front. Protruding from either side of me, below my waist, are two bony knobs, which form what many doctors call 'baby-bearing hips.' These are obviously some sort of anomaly to the world, since at the mall this weekend I found no clothes that recognized them as normal. Let me just put this straight. I am not fat. In fact, I’m decently thin. But I have that hourglass shape that supposedly is so desirable, but no clothing manufacturer admits exists. Shopping for skirts, pants, dresses is a nightmare and there are certain stores that I walk in knowing I’ll walk out in tears. Ann Taylor does not believe in hips. I don’t know if she has them or not, but I know she doesn’t allow anyone working at her stores to have them. Her dresses are cute little sheaths or slim skirts, where the waist and hips are different in circumference by about a half-inch. Express only believe in hips when you find the occasionally a-line skirt. Don’t even think of pants. Gap hates hips, but has made one concession – Reverse Fit jeans. Though hard to find, these jeans are the staples of my wardrobe and the only hint I have of a hip-friendly future." -Jennifer Lofquist

To read the rest of the article (which I can relate to so well!) go here: a moms love

For all you girls out there who have had a hard time finding a pair of jeans that FIT, speak out! Write letters, inform managers, draw hourglasses and insist this body is correct and DEMAND clothes that are designed to fit your sexy figures!

Reclaim yourself.

I wanted a place to keep track of things. I want to hear stories and explain situations and write down my findings on women and sex and our bodies and what they mean and how they work and why they are treated how they are in this society. I want a place for people to go when they have questions and I want to be asked questions to find answers through research and experience. Ohmymaybee is a blog about women, choices and decisions based on health and information.

(picture by Cristy C. Road)