Roseanne on Riot Grrrl!

A friend of mine wrote an awesome post a couple weeks ago about calling out a man who was sexually harassing her and asking much too personal questions. She just got me thinking about how awesome it is that women are calling out men in these types of situations. I mean really, it's just AWESOME because not only is she writing to this man's employer about how uncomfortable he made her feel.. but she's probably voicing the opinion of many other women who are too nervous to say anything because we've been taught to be polite to the point of not knowing if saying NO is okay or not. I've thought about this before because it has happened to me so many times. One time that comes to mind was when I was on MUNI pretending to sleep and the man next to me started rubbing my leg. Then he moved his hand closer and closer to my crotch, and while I was completely frozen in fear.. I couldn't speak up because I wasn't SURE that he was doing what he was doing on purpose (he so totally WAS) and I didn't want to be impolite. I ended up unfreezing when he finally got off MUNI. I don't even know what he looked like because I couldn't move enough to look up. As soon as he was gone, I had a giant panic attack and started crying gallons of tears out of anger (at him and myself for not being able to say anything) and resentment. I later learned to be less hard on myself since this was my body's natural reaction to someone causing me pain.. curl up in a ball and it will all be over soon. Unfortunately, I'm TIRED of reacting this way.. I love my body but I am ready for it to LET LOOSE AND SCREAM. I think young girls especially should be taught that there is a difference between being polite and knowing boundaries. They need to learn when it is okay to not only speak up, but be aggressive. I think that if I had learned these things, I could have gotten myself out of a TON of really bad situations because boundaries would be crystal clear and not fuzzy like they have been in many situations in the past.

This is why my friend speaking up is a HUGE deal. This is why any woman speaking up is a HUGE deal. This is how feminism and riot grrrl saved my life. The fact that the riot grrrl movement has allowed women to not only speak up but YELL and SCREAM and MOVE and LET LOOSE instead of stand quietly with our hands clasped tightly and our mouths doing the same is re-training our bodies and brains to know when to say NO. I for one know I wouldn't be as strong or as empowered in my skin, especially after all the abuse my body has gone through. Especially after I've called the police on multiple occasions to come save my beautiful lady friends from being raped, abused, harassed, and assaulted by men.. or sometimes calling too late to have them pick up the broken pieces while I held their hands and let them scream. I don't know about some people, but if there's one thing riot grrrl has taught me, it's to be LOUD! For this, I am THANKFUL.

For those of you who have no idea what riot grrrl is, I would highly suggest reading THIS as it's pretty spot on. It changed my life. Also, in the midst of research, I was lucky enough to find this LOVELY LADY'S blog Soul Ponies. Her entry on Why 2010 will be the year of the riot grrrl revival if we want it to be got me super amped. I left her a comment and now we're on our way to starting something HUGE. I'M SO EXCITED!!!! I want to scream!

Today I was shown something SO AWESOME! I think I've seen every episode of Roseanne ever made (talk about a feminist!) but I don't remember ever seeing this episode about RIOT GRRRL! Crazy right?! Thanks to the lovely Amber for posting this on her facebook.



RIOT GRRRL!

Radical Self Love Month!

Radical Self Love Month

Every now and then I'll pop my head into Gala Darling's world to see what she is up to. I'm not a big fan of fashion - I'm terrible at it truth be told, but I do appreciate Gala's overall mission. Allowing girls of all shapes and sizes, ages, and backgrounds to take a look at themselves and LOVE who they are. This is why I think her idea for Radical Self Love Month is pretty amazing. Here's a tid-bit from her blog:

"Distractions have their place but when they are never-ending, eventually they stop working…

As fun as it can be to have a boyfriend or girlfriend, go shopping or wear false eyelashes, life won’t really start to bloom until we’re comfortable with who we are. This is true every day, but becomes even poignant on Valentine’s Day, typically a celebration of someone else being in love with us.

So many of us are looking for someone else to fill a space, love & approve of us or take away our loneliness.

But whose love & approval is most important? Someone else’s? Or your own?" -Gala Darling via her Radical Self Love post




As a part of this months mission, she will be assigning homework and bringing up subjects of all sorts such as: "Girl love, body image, masturbation, jealousy, honoring & respecting yourself, positive self-talk, being assertive, manifesting your own dream girl persona & self-marriage are all up for grabs!" Pretty awesome! So, to start things off right, I went out and bought a moleskin, drew a giant anatomical heart on the front and got to work keeping track of my month of radical self love.