gender neutral bathrooms.

img borrowed from martlet.ca

Can we talk about gender neutral bathrooms for a minute?

A couple years ago I had a big crush on this girl who quit the company we were working for and decided to start a new project. That project was Safe2pee. It's pretty clever actually, you know, if you're trans, or gender neutral, and you're uncomfortable walking into a bathroom and feeling unsafe. But this got me thinking. Last night I went to a riot grrrl show of sorts and I noticed that they had slapped some signs over the bathroom doors that said "gender neural". It sort of bothered me. Let me explain why:

As a woman who has had enough issues just walking down the street and getting harassed by men, why would I want to go into a bathroom with them? A closed off place that could easily turn into a very nasty situation. We all want to feel safe, but I for one would not feel even remotely safe being in the same bathroom with a man that I don't know. Actually, just the thought sort of really bothers me emotionally. A room that basically pertains to the exposure of our genitals. Using the bathroom is already sort of personal, but add a man to the equation and this is just an awful situation for many women who have had traumatizing experiences (which is a large percentage of the population in this world). I thought about this as i sat in the one stall that was in the men's bathroom feeling nervous that potentially, some random dude could just walk in at any time.

"The drive to ask for this comes from observing violence, harassment, and intimidation that is directed at some people routinely -- transgender people especially -- when they enter public facilities to undertake a basic human function." -http://queeraction.uchicago.edu/bathroomindex.html

See, I get this. I do. And I understand that people should just be more open minded and tolerant of one another. Unfortunately, that's just not the case. The majority of this world has an outdated mentality that needs to be worked on. This just seems like such a backwards idea to me. Bathrooms should be open for anyone so no one feels unsafe, but that leaves a large chunk of us feeling extremely unsafe. I just don't think this is a very well thought out idea. I personally like the idea of being all inclusive, but overall, we're just not there yet. As women, we are brought up to be alert and to make sure our surroundings are safe - which is an unfortunate circumstance in itself. But it happens for a reason. We're still so far behind and there is still great reason to be alert and be aware. Having gender neutral bathrooms sounds like a wonderful idea, but is that for everyone, or just those who refer to themselves as "gender neutral"?